This wonderful person m_stiefvater  posted this about confidencel and it got me thinking. I’ve copied part of my comment to this post, and added and edited some random musing.

Being confident is not always the same as being good at something, although being successful certainly helps your confidence. Self confidence is the fuel that moves us forward, makes us take one more step, to give it one more try, and has nothing to do with results or talent.

In another life I was a karate instructor and have observed the fragile skin of natural talent. The dojo floor is the equaliser; you will eventually get your arse kicked. The ones who are scarred the most from this ego crushing experience are the born gifted. The hard workers take it on the chin, or the butt cheek, and move on.   

Self confidence is not a measure of success or talent. Confidence is a product of achievement and maturity. Self confidence is the bio-fuel needed for the long haul.

Everyone has something they're good at. Knowing yourself, I believe, is paramount for self confidence; helps you identify and honour that one thing. It may be something easily overlooked: a great smile, always finding the right key the first time, peeling an orange so the skin remains together—it’s a gift baby. Once you know yourself, how you think, why you think, what you really mean, self confidence grows. Find one thing, and I guarantee you'll find another.

From an energetic perspective, being shy or nervous, is only that, and is not a measure of self confidence. I was and remain a shy person, but I’m able to let self confidence guide my passions. Shy people learn to observe, and develop a heightened sense of understanding, and or intuition. There’s nothing more exhilarating than watching a shy person become animated about something they’re passionate about. You have to believe them because they look so innocent: bright eyes, flustered cheeks, bloody hell take a breath, conviction and belief strangling embarrassment—yes I believe you!

If you have to tell people how good you are, then that’s ego. Show, don't tell. Funny thing about ego is that no one has ego until they're judged to have it. Stand in an empty room and be as extroverted and as confident as you can and nobody cares. It might be a bit lonely, but no ones going to say you’re an egotistical wanker.

If that’s the case then why is there so much mind/body/spirit literature on overcoming the ego mind/self?

Too much effort is directed at overcoming ego. We all have it, but it becomes Jacks beanstalk only when it’s observed with envy. Are you successful? I hope so. Tell me a happy story, something that you’re proud of, and I won’t be jealous. Your hard work, good fortune, prosperity, and jubilation inspire me to reach my goals.

Maggie is a published author, so I went on to say.

I dream success; my books already published and selling in 30 countries. If I want it to happen I need to work hard and be smart. Next month a journalist wants to do a story about me, and someone I respect, someone talented, wants to read my manuscript, and that has happened because I keep putting one foot in front of another. It’s self confidence that drives that foot. Am I nervous? Hell yeah! But in my mind I'm already on Oprah.

As far as being published is concerned, I think that’s like threading a needle with your tongue. There's going to be blood eventually. I have to find someone who believes in my product as much as I do and then it has to be polished, sold, and marketed. I only get one chance. Don't let the no’s knock you around, it’s not personal. Life is like being a ram in a paddock of ewes; there's opportunity everywhere, but in publishing, there's one fine ewe looking over a paddock of rams, and she's fussy.